Relationships

Relationships are very important.

In our work in treating young people with depression it is important to form a therapeutic relationship with them.

During the interview the young people tell us their story in which they often describe what had happened and what had one wrong in relationships especially if there has been trauma, abuse, betrayal, shame and bullying.

When anyone shares such details about their life, they are putting alot of trust in us. Trust between young people and the therapist, psychologist and doctor is vital.

Imagine then how a young people would feel if then after their first interview, when they have tried to tell us everything, under considerable pressure, we say that someone else will see them, or they will be having CBT on a computer screen or remain on a waiting list for months to see a psychologist?

Naturally some young people are reluctant to engage and find it really hard to trust others, especially if they have suffered trauma in their lives. Therefore relating to young people becomes an investment of time and emotional reserves, which is a great privilege in our work. Parents need to make this investment too.

In the beginning there is the first relationship we all have with our mother and father. When a baby is born there is a surge of the hormone Oxytocin, which helps the mother and baby bond. The baby feeds and the mother and father feel a surge of love for their new baby, who has a uniquely interesting smell.

In some families mothers experience domestic violence and fathers experience the stress of economic hardship and are not present. This can lead a mother to post natal depression, which can prevent the mother having a good bond with her baby, unless she can access treatment promptly. Maternal depression in the UK is the number one cause of death in new mothers, which is a rare occurrence.

At nursery and primary school children had to separate form their families and adapt to the teacher, other children and a new environment. In England children go to school at the age of four years, whilst in Denmark they school at the age of 7 years. Most children have an interest in playing with other children, although some do not. If children have interest in play and making friends they will be able to form their relationships at school.

At secondary school relationship formation is important again, as children in year seven naturally feel stressed in relation to forming and keeping new precious friendships. Some children handle these relationship transactions better than others.

How does digital social media influence the formation of relationships in the modern age?

Add new comment